Last weekend, DisGrace told me that her mother-in-law had stopped eating. She's 85 and has dementia and we all kind of figured she was saying it's time.
She passed on Monday.
She was such a sweet lady. I first met Vera when I was 16. DisGrace and Dunka Darren (LM's name for him) were newly engagged and there was a family reunion in Hairyzona over Thanksgiving break that year. I had a school dance I insisted on attending, so DisGrace and Dunka Darren said they'd take me down with them the next day. We stopped in St. George and had dinner with Vera and Theron, Dunka Darren's dad. I remember just visiting with them and being completely disgusted by the starburst-swapping going on while Dunka Darren was driving down the freeway. Ew. Gag.
Thankfully, Dunka Darren has been in our lives ever since.
So has Vera.
Even more thankfully, I haven't been forced to witness any more starburst swapping.
VOD has called her Gramma Vera for her whole life. We visited her with and without DisGrace and the kids. We took dinner to her on several occasions. Saw her at the care center where she's been living the last few years. And she and Theron stayed with my folks for a while when they moved up here years ago. Theron died in 1999. We're all happy for them that they are reunited.
Tuesday, Hyzenth told me she's moving to Montana. She is one of the few local friends I get to hang out with on occasion, and now she's going away. What the what? *cry*
Late Wednesday night, a gay man was beaten up by at least 3 attackers in the tri-town area we grew up in. Oh yeah. I know him. He is one of the kindest people you could ever meet. I'm pretty sure most people know that beating up anyone for being different is just plain wrong. There were no witnesses. Three men ganged up on him around 12:45 a.m. as he took the trash out at his place of work. One of his co-workers found him a few hours later. These attackers may think they have gotten away with something, but God knows who they are and what they did. They will pay eventually.
The Rock has been having a bipolar episode all week related to school and me starting school and being stressed out. And the baby isn't sleeping so well with all the bedroom rearranging we've been doing and it's still not done and we had to tackle the living room instead of finishing because she kept turning off the surge protector to the Xbox ... VOD woke up yelling at everyone and put me in a tizzy, too. And then Bitty got her car seat all sticky this morning so I had to change them all around and the new one my mom gave us is different and harder to install and by the time I got it in, I was a sweaty mess and my eye makeup was smeared down to my chin.
So I was worn out and emotional and completely bonkers by the time we got out the door to get to Vera's funeral. I didn't have time to shower and change and get fresh makeup on, just had to wipe off the smears and go. Good thing I'd showered earlier. While I was wrestling the car seats, Little Mister dumped bubbles all over his corduroy pants and I asked VOD to get him a clean pair of pants, and I didn't notice until we were on our way to the church that she put sweat pants on him.
So not appropriate for a funeral. GRRRR.
We finally made it and sat down, but Little Mister was running circles around me and asked to go see DisGrace. When she reached out for a hug, he screamed, "NO!" and ran away. I hauled him out to the foyer and stayed out there with him. VOD and KC kept Bitty for a while.
He was being SO frustrating. SO three. SO boy. Running around, full of energy, being disobedient, when I just wanted him to sit still and STOP for 5 minutes so I could cope. I finally just sat on the floor, cleaned up the markers he'd uncapped and thrown everywhere, and stayed where I was, trying not to be hysterical or mean or cry.
He looked at my face and this, "Oh, Mommy," look came over his. He very calmly turned around and sat his little self down on my crossed legs. And we snuggled for about 3 minutes. I breathed in his little boy scent, and that made him laugh. I ran my fingers through his hair (which is finally growing back after we buzzed him early in the summer), and that made him laugh more. I squeezed him with my arms and kissed his cheek and breathed him in again, and we both laughed.
The rest of the day wasn't super easy, but I wasn't as bad off as I'd started. As hard as those days can be and as rough as this week has been, times like that really do make it all worth it.